Oceans

 

This week we learned that Tig's mom is non other than Aqua Girl!

We also learned that whales are smarter than humans. The day may soon come when their whimpering shouts will be deciphered and reveal that the Earth is a giant space whale egg waiting to hatch, and we are but tiny parasites feeding off it's shell. But then I guess the tiny whales in the space whale egg shell's wet spots would also be parasites, and why would there be parasites floating around that resembled the larger organism they were feeding off of?

Are you following what I'm saying here, cause I have a feeling the whales totally get me. And by the way Tig, aka Aqua Girl's daughter, speaks whaleish. Every episode she opens the show by saying, "Beep boop bop boop", which translates to mean, "Hey friend. High five friend!" Of course instead of giving high fives, whales smack their flappities together.

One last thing about whales and then I'll move on. This week we also spoke with our special guest and student of Oceanography, Taylor Semingson, about the ocean and where waves came from. He didn't know for sure but he said most believed that it was due to the moon, and David played devils advocate and said that maybe it wasn't the moon that caused waves at all, that there was a documentary about not needing the moon. Well let me suggest that waves could be caused by all those ginormous whales swishing around in there! Which makes sense, because most of the people fighting to rescue the whales on the Whale Wars tv show love to surf!

Next I would like to take a moment to state that it is gravity, not God's hands, that is keeping the Earth's water down. Also, I believe there is a protective electromagnetic field/shield that keeps the water vapor from escaping our atmosphere, or something like that.

Now that I have that off my chest, I'm excited to say that I was able to find the lost clip of the week! We tried to show this during the episode but it was taken down by the internet police. It was sunken, like the lost city of Atlantis, if you will. The clip talks about ancient underwater aliens and how more books have been written about the lost city of Atlantis than any other subject. Well, I call BS on that! Why just the other day I went into the bookstore and asked the fine lady at the checkout counter if she could point me to the lost city of Atlantis section. She said she couldn't because it was lost...then after laughing at her own joke she said that they did not have a section dedicated solely to the lost city of Atlantis! They did however have sections dedicated to hundreds of other fantasy topics, including teen vampire and zombie romance novels. Anyway watch this:

I found that video to be rather nuts you guys. The fact that all these scientists are still trying to uncover the mystery of Atlantis even after that Awesome Michael J. Fox cartoon came out, baffles me. That movie was pretty cool, so lets just accept that as what happened and move on. There is no point in obsessing about a city who's records are most likely soaked by now. And unless the lost city of Atlantis had magical ink and paper that could withstand thousands of years of water damage, then... oh wait. I guess they could have written things down on stone or Gold or something. So I suppose it makes sense to look for that. Whelp, carry on scuba-diver archeologists!

Check out professorblastoff.com for clips we aired and my website aaronburrellcomedy.com

Listen to episode #34 " Oceans"